Word of the Day: Biosex

biosex (n): a portmanteau neologism of "biological" and "sex"

For the past year here at Sexpertesse - as well in my experiences as an educator, researcher, and commentator - I've been using this word "biosex" without letting my audience in on a critical element of the word's history. I've casually talked about "biosex this" and "biosex that" and "his biosex" and "my chromosomsal biosex" as if this was a word that everyone knew and used in everyday conversation. But there's a little secret about "biosex:" the truth is, I made the word up.

For years now, I've watched as some people cringed or became embarrassed when I talked about "sex." The problem was, I wasn't always talking about the act of sex, but rather about the biological reality determined through a sex-determination system. Additionally, I've had conversations in which I mistook one "sex" for another. Once, while chatting with a friend about a new woman I had met, my friend asked, "And what's her sex?" Given the context of this meeting - this woman and I had befriended one another at a health summit for transgender people - I know now that my friend intended to ask me if my new friend was cis- or transgender. However, I, like many people, thought of only the more titillating definition of the word "sex," and so I replied, "Uh...I think she likes dudes," and clarified with the brilliant information that "I think she's vanilla because she wasn't wearing a collar or something." Clearly, I had misunderstood the question; the information requested did not regard her sexual activities or interests, but her biology.

And so I created "biosex." Its etymology is simple: it's a portmanteau of "biological" and "sex," and is used exactly in the same manner as "sex."

Word of the Day: Qmunity

qmunity (n): a neologism and portmanteau of "queer" and "community" used both as a community name and an individual identity

Example 1:
The qmunity is made up of many people who identify as bisexual, homosexual, transgender, or something akin to those things.

Example 2:
Person A: Is she qmunity?
Person B: Yep, she's qmunity; she's married to a lovely woman named Genevieve!

At present, many LGBT organizations are considering the implications of the continued use of the term "LGBT." They consider both the practical and ideological. On the practical level, they note that "LGBT" fails to recognize all of the aspects of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and/or transgender people; for instance, "LGBT" fails to recognize a butch identity or that a bisexual person may feel more attracted to one biosex than another. On the ideological level, some note how a delineated acronym de facto fails to identify the diversity said acronym attempts to include.

In order to address this problem, some have suggested that the LGBT people adopt the identity "queer" in order to be more inclusive. Some, including people both inside and outside the community, are uncomfortable with using the word "queer," citing the term's derogative history. Others, however, claim that adoption of the word "queer" is an act of reclamation, the process of changing the meaning of a pejorative term into one of positivity and community solidarity. For example, the words "nigger," "tranny," and "bitch" have all been (at least somewhat) reappropriated by some members of the black, transgender, and feminist communities.

Personally, I'm on the fence about reclaimation. The idea is beautiful, but I'm not convinced that it's working. One need look no further than ongoing cultural battles about the use of the word "nigger" and the difference between the words "nigger" and "nigga" to see that reclaimation is not perfect. To that end, I'm not totally on-board with the word "queer."

At the same time, I recognize that the term "LGBT" isn't perfect, and so I suggest a new word that attempts to utilize all of the inclusivity of the word "queer" but forgoes its questionable etymology - qmunity. "Qmunity" can be used both as the name of a community and as an individual's identity. Additionally, the word is pronounced as "kew-mew-nit-ee."

Word of the Day: Passing

passing (n): it's a lot easier to accept myself if you accept me first

Word of the Day: Refractory Period

refractory period (n): the timespan, usually in a male, after orgasm in which a person is incapable of achieving another orgasm

After a male orgams, his penis becomes flaccid and he cannot orgasm for some time; this is the refractory period. The vast, vast majority of males experience a refractory period, and it lasts about thirty minutes on average. It is normal for a man's refractory period to grow longer as he ages; some studies find that 18-year-old men have a refractory period of about fifteen minutes and 70-year-olds have one that last about two hours. A few males do not have a refractory period, or at least one that is only a few seconds, although they are a very small minority.

Unlike males, females do not usually have a refractory period, and thus they are able to acheive multiple orgams through continued stimulation. Pro Tip, men into women: your refractory period is a great time to focus on your partner, maybe through oral sex or another beloved activity that doesn't require your genitals. She'll definately appreciate this time, gentlemen!